Angela Deutschmann

Experience Truth

Emotional Training Part I

The world of emotions has always confounded me – what are emotions exactly, why do some people tend towards a particular range of them, do we get to transcend them as we move up the evolutionary ladder and, in the meanwhile, how do we grow from the messy, tender, enigmatic things?

Two readings this week have begun an interesting line of enquiry into emotions and their place in the human experience. This excerpt is the first part of the teaching, the rest will follow in the next newsletter:

‘Consider yourself standing in a train station. In front of you is a train with a host of carriages. This is the Train of Emotion, with each carriage representing a different emotion ranging right the way from grief to rapture with everything in-between. At any given point in time you step into a particular carriage, let’s say ‘Anger’. When you are experiencing the emotion of anger, it is NOT YOU that has become anger, you are simply within anger in the same way you are within a specific carriage for a certain part of your journey. The language you are used to identifies you far too strongly with your emotions. You say ‘I am angry’ and as a result your identity becomes too closely related to anger. It would be more useful to understand that you are within anger; in this way you don’t consider that you are anger itself any more than you would consider that you are the carriage you occupy at any given time. The emotion is simply the vehicle that is carrying you at any moment.

When you are able to dissociate your emotion from who you are, it is much easier to make use of it. Every single emotion is useful and godly, even if you have been taught that ‘negative’, or unpleasant ones are not. It is possible to become powerful while you are within ‘negative’ emotional states and very weak while you are within ‘positive’ ones, can you see that? Consider how disempowered some people become while they are in love and how strong others become from a period of despair. That shows you that it is not the carriage you are in that determines whether you are being powerful or not, it is the way you respond to being in that carriage.

It is not your conscious self that chooses the carriage you are in at any specific moment, have you noticed?! Do you wake up and decide consciously to be depressed, or elated on a given day? Can you will yourself to authentically feel any emotion at any time? No. It is your higher self, or soul, who puts you in a carriage according to the life plan it is guiding you through. That is why some people respond to a situation with laughter and others with tears – there is no ‘appropriate’ emotion for a given situation, there is only the emotional range that your soul is busy developing from at this time and it will place you in a carriage accordingly.

Does that mean you are at the mercy of your emotions and unaccountable for them? Certainly not! As we have said, your point of control is the way you choose to respond to being in a particular carriage. You can fight it, be ashamed of it, try to claw your way out of the door or try to cling on desperately to the feeling, if you like it. You can deny where you are, ignore it, repress it or become so addicted to the pain that you never let go of it. We would instead suggest the following if you would like to use any given carriage, or emotion, to become more powerful:

1. Clarify where exactly you are at any moment using as precise a word as possible (e.g. does ‘feeling down’ mean feeling sad, empty or resentful?)
2. Acknowledge and, if you can, be grateful for that carriage, or emotion (this is the most immediate catalyst for opening up the gift in it)
3. Identify any judgments you hold about this carriage (it helps to think about where you have judged others for feeling the same thing e.g. ‘she really shouldn’t be so joyous, her mother only died a few weeks ago’)

April 2006


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