Angela Deutschmann Newsletter
November 2009
Hi everyone
November is an exciting month for me as it holds both a Jump workshop (available to members of a Spiritual Growth Club) as well as the final Embody of the year. If you’re interested to know more about Embody, join us for a free webinar at 8pm tonight, Wednesday 4 November, where I will talk about the process, how it originated and what results you can expect. (For those of you who missed the talk it is available as a download here.)
There is also a segment about Embody on the CNBC Africa programme Healthy Business, DSTV channel 410, next Friday 13 November at 20.30.
Embody is the direct result of my own pain and is therefore a very
powerful healing opportunity for anyone interested in reconnecting to
their body, hearing its voice and releasing what it has been storing.
Join me on 20 November for an experience that will reprogramme your
relationship with your body forever.
Thanks to the next group of courageous folk who embarked on a Shadow
Work process last night. I’ll be running another Introductory Shadow
Workshop on Tuesday 8 December as well an Advanced Shadow Workshop on 12
December for those who wish to take it further. Please don’t miss this
if you are serious about your own growth. There’s a beautiful reading
reproduced below called The Journey of a Seed, which I channelled in
July. It is also clearly an invitation into your resistance – though
these subtle pointers to shadow work are only clear to me now! If you
have had a reading before, I encourage you to review it because often
the penny only drops further down the line. Here’s an appetiser:
‘Knowing now that you cannot be emerged or born into the light until you
have encountered all your resistances, gives you more permission to do
so. Make that a priority. We cannot think of what would be a bigger
priority than going fully into your own resistances, into your own pain,
and coming out the other side, because without that your emergence is
not possible.’
In January 2010 we start another Angela Deutschmann Growth Club in
Johannesburg. See what happens in your life if you dare to devote 12
months to regular jumps forward in your growth! Testimonials,
applications and more info Spiritual
Growth Club.
There will not be a group reading in November but please keep an eye on
the newsletter for a 2010 Group Reading towards the end of the year
Much love
Angela
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Upcoming Events
Shadow Workshop
All of us have internalised the idea, to greater or lesser extents,
that there are qualities, emotions and experiences that are wrong –
envy, cruelty, certain desires, anger etc. This has resulted in most of
us suppressing or controlling these feelings to such an extent that we
swallow instead of express them and, in so doing, push them into the
shadow. After a while of pushing parts of ourselves away from our
conscious recognition, we begin to be very fragmented resulting (most
commonly) in fatigue, confusion or irrational self-sabotage.
It’s impossible to know your passion, for example, if you have not
really known your anger because anger and passion are two sides of the
same coin. By the same token, if you are repressing your pain you are
undoubtedly also repressing your joy. For those of you who are
courageous enough to begin seeing what parts you have pushed into
shadow, I will be offering an introductory Shadow Workshop where we will
work practically with these concepts in a small group. You can expect
the processes to be uncomfortable, and you can also expect to leave the
workshop deeply relieved and released.
White River
Date: Saturday 28 November 2009
Time: 9am to 12.30pm
Venue: Sheldon Farm. Please request directions if necessary
Cost: R250.00 per person payable in advance. Includes tea and coffee
To book contact Garrick at +27844608667 or via email
Johannesburg
Date: Tuesday 8 December 2009
Time: 7pm sharp to 10pm
Venue: Wiesenhaus, 63A Rutland Rd, Parkwood
Cost: R250.00 per person payable in advance. Includes tea and coffee
To book contact Garrick at +27844608667 or via email
For personal stories on my own shadow work you can read the articles 'Vampires and Vultures’ and ‘From Holy to Wholly’ on my blog..
Advanced Shadow Workshop
For those who completed and found value in the above Introductory
workshop (or Growth Club session), I have created a full-day, more
intimate opportunity to explore and integrate your shadow.
Join me for some games, group work and face-to-face contact with your
resistance to launch you firmly into more wholeness and freedom. Only
twelve places available.
Date: Saturday 12 December 2009
Time: 9am to 4pm
Venue: 42 Tyrone Avenue, Parkview
Cost: R650.00 per person payable in advance. Includes tea and coffee
To book contact Garrick at +27844608667 or via email
Embody
The Embody workshop is the result of my personal pain about my body.
For years I was so confident, sure and present in my mind and
spirituality and at the same time, so ashamed, disconnected and
undeveloped in my body. I opened up all this pain and transformed it
into an exceptionally powerful and unique workshop that puts you back in
touch, in conversation and in love with your body even if you haven’t
been there for years.
Our bodies, like everything else, are communicators to us. They
communicate our divinity, in an immediate, uncomplicated manner. Our
bodies are as profound a source of wisdom to us as our minds and
spirits. They are faithfully attuned to our highest path, even though we
are ashamed of them, hate them and, more often that not, attempt to
control their expression.
It is our bodies that are meant to shape us, not us who are meant to shape our bodies.
If you are brave enough to fully see and own your own body,
compassionate enough to accept the bodies of others and wild enough to
fall unconditionally in love with your body – forever - then I invite
you to Embody.
One participant’s experience:
‘My Embody experience is best described when I think of the story of
Beauty and the Beast! How the beast needed to find the love for who he
was before he physically transformed into the gorgeous prince. I can
truly appreciate what Embody puts on the table in terms of concepts and
processes. Having my life structured in such a way where I am required
to be constantly intellectual in all that I do and how I approach left
me disconnected from my body and my basic right to FEEL as God / My Soul
/ Higher Power intended.
Looking back my journey at Embody, I realise how I needed to shave the
layers away to start feeling again. How I needed to cut away the
restraints and allow for all that was great within me to naturally
surface to the light to be experienced and integrate into my
consciousness. No amount of positive thinking, visualisation or any
intellectual approach could have leaped me forward as Embody allowed me
to be. FEELING, being PRESENT in my own skin and AWARE of my body's
voice was all I needed. I had to learn to step into pain, shame and at
some points even hatred! But that is the beauty of life as I realised on
Embody. You feel that pain / shame / fear / hatred and then transmute
and so you make space for greatness and all that is good! Amen!
I am reminded what it feels like to be safe, vulnerable and loved
through my eyes! Reminded how playing big, taking risks and plunging in
enables the sweet bliss of freedom and lightness to find a sweet spot in
my life. Because after all, when we working with the soul and our
bodies, the people that really matter will see my beauty. Thank you to
Angela, Shaun and my Fellow Embody Graduates! I have been gifted with
love and a new level of "being" to operate from. Amazed when one is not
weighed down with the intellectual clutter picked up along the way in
life, how perspective, inspired action, focus and just feeling with
every cell makes one BURN with ALIVENESS and BLISS. I am grateful that I
was able to step into my "beast" and found my "beauty" that I can now go
forward and strengthen’. Brynmore, Management Consultant
You can also read more about this pioneering process, including stories from graduates, here.
Next Embody:
Date: Friday 20 – Sunday 22 November 2009 (last one of 2009)
Venue: Boondocks Mountain Lodge, between Nelspruit and Barberton
Cost: R 5 800.00 includes full accommodation, delicious meals, 30 hours
of personalised input from two expert facilitators and exclusive use of
this magnificent lodge and labyrinth
Payment plans available
To book contact Garrick at +27844608667 or via email
Spiritual Growth Clubs
‘Having worked with Angela this past year has been an amazing
experience. I use the word experience as through her processes and
methodology I have been able to move from the intellectualising and the
cognitive awareness that I used to deal with life and actually start to
feel, emote and engage totally differently and live the aspect of
“Experience trumps Awareness”. It has been an amazing journey for me to
get to this place, it is through her brilliant application of Ontology
that has made this possible. Getting to this point has added huge value
to not only my life but has taken my coaching to a whole new level.
Spending time with the group each month and ending off with our own
tailor-made Jump workshop has been invaluable to me on so many levels
and has given me a lucid indication of where my Joy lies. I have had a
profound shift based directly on the workshop and know that choices that
I have made in the days, weeks and month following the workshop have
been done with clarity and certainty that they not only add my Joy but I
am liberated to follow and commit to it.’ Gavin, Ontological Coach
An increasing number of people are committing themselves to conscious,
responsible and empowered living. The number and variety of spiritual
workshops and therapies attest to this. Yet, more is required to
manifest awareness in action than just a once-off intervention. Personal
transformation is a dynamic and ongoing process and requires consistent
integration and support, whether that is in the form of honest feedback,
access to new knowledge or motivation. Often we attempt, or feel we are
forced, to pursue our spiritual development in isolation. Besides the
fact that this reinforces a consciousness of separation, it can also
leave us blinkered to our own stumbling blocks or gifts or next steps.
My popular Spiritual Growth Clubs provide a rare opportunity to walk
your personal path in fellowship with like-minded people who are open to
learning, sharing and growing as much as you are. They also come with
expert facilitation and access to all the new insight with which I work.
Contact Garrick to
register for the next group (January 2010) or to learn more.
‘It has been very difficult to put into words how best to describe my
experience in a Growth Club. The Growth Club provided me with a safe and
respectful space to express my deepest pain and emotions - a place to be
real, raw and authentic. Through this year long process I was able to
grow, to shift, to gain such huge awareness about myself, learning to
trust myself, to respect and honour my intuition and to fully experience
the rawest of emotions that I would ordinarily never have had the space
to do so. Angela’s exceptionally respectful and honouring approach is
hugely appreciated and her gentleness and beauty permeates in
everything. I thank her for giving me the cushion to "land safely"
through the year and my Jump process and to gain inner strength and
depth. I value the privilege of having been given this blessing to learn
and grow with her. A very privileged Club to be in. Thank you’ Ilana,
owner Magical Moments
Personal Readings and Spiritual Coaching Sessions
A personal, or couple’s, reading is a session where I channel insight from your higher self about what is most dominant in your ‘field’ at that time. This can include patterns you are holding, some of your life themes, blockages in your body, the particular cycle you are in at the time or what thought patterns may be holding you back from feeling free. Usually there is an opportunity to ask specific questions if you wish to, but the reading will take on a particular direction or set of themes right from the start. The energy of these conversations is gentle, incredibly loving yet also full of humour and practical suggestions.
Time required: 90 minutes
Cost: R600.00
A baby blessing, which can be done at a baby shower or as a regular reading, is a conversation with an unborn child. They are normally shorter than an hour, though this depends very much on the chattiness of the child! Best time to have one is between 20 and 35 weeks pregnant.
A spiritual coaching session does not involve direct channelling. It is an opportunity for you to bring specific issues to the session, perhaps those that came up in a previous reading but not necessarily, and to work with my questions and ideas on these. I don’t follow a specific coaching methodology and will work with what comes up in the moment using discussion or physical movement or conscious dreaming or anything else that can move you forward. A warning: I’ve been heard to say ‘I couldn’t give a damn about your success…I’m only interested in your Joy’!
Time required: 50 minutes
Cost: R450.00
Contact Garrick on +27844608667 or via email if you are interested in booking a distance reading or a one-on-one session in Johannesburg, Cape Town, Bloemfontein or White River.
Bird Cards
For those interested in joining my fascination and work with Jane Toerien’s Bird Cards (www.birdcards.net) I am now stocking these myself and you’re welcome to contact Garrick to purchase them at R250.00 per box set (Exclusive Books sells them for over R300.00 when you can get them and they are R931.00 on Kalahari).
Bull's Eye
November 2009
The Journey of a Seed
Nature mirrors some extraordinary learning for us. In a reading from
a few months ago, the journey of a seed was used to teach four important
principles of personal growth:
1. Every seed (human being) is innately designed to grow best at a
particular depth and there is no value in trying to make someone ‘go
deeper’ than they desire.
2. No seed, no matter how perfect and miraculous, can grow on its own.
Just as seeds require external factors (sun, water etc) to grow, human
beings need each other in order to develop.
3. A seed grows even though it cannot see where it is going and does not
yet know what it will become.
4. The first part of a seed’s journey is growing through the darkness
(soil) and the first, unavoidable, part of the human journey is growing
through our resistances. Only after growing through our resistance
(pain) can we push through and grow in the light (joy).
This is an excerpt from the reading, expanding on points 3 and 4:
A Seed Still Grows in the Dark
‘The third element of the seed pushing its way through the soil to
produce itself in all its glory is this: the seed cannot see where
exactly it is going, and it does not know what it is going to become at
the end of the journey. Oh, so many of the modern-day teachers are
telling you that you need to see the path clearly before it will
manifest and that you need to know precisely what you wish to grow, or
grow into, before it is possible to grow. A seed does not see a thing.
It is in fact buried underneath the ground. And for the first part of
its journey, it is in darkness. It is still fed by the light, but it is
in darkness. It cannot see the world that it is going to grow into, and
it still grows. That is the faith of a seed. There was a moment, in the
teaching of Jesus, when he compared faith to a seed. It was very wise,
and here we are expanding on that story, in a way that we have never
done before.
A seed grows even when it is in the dark. A seed does not know what it
is yet. It does not know where it is going. It cannot see anything, it
is in the dark. For the first part of a seed’s journey it is in the
dark. And so it is with human beings too. There is so much focus, so
much pressure, to try to get people to a sense of sureness, or clarity,
about who they are and what they are going to grow into. But you cannot
bring that knowledge until that journey has naturally got to that point.
There is a part of a seed’s life when it grows in the dark. And there is
a part of your journeys where you grow in the dark. And that is not
wrong, and you do not need to try very hard to know something before it
is revealed to you. It is not so that the seed refuses to grow because
it doesn’t know what it is growing towards. It has its faith. It still
urges itself forward and up, though it has no idea of what is awaiting
it, or what it is. That is the faith of a seed. You are surrounded by
such seeds. If you could take some inspiration from their journey, you
would be able to put it to enormous use in your own.
The First Part of a Seed’s Journey is Growing Through Resistance
It is also significant for you to see, and this is the fourth
learning we will offer today, that through the first part of a seed’s
journey it is growing through resistance. When it pushes out of the soil
and carries on its journey in the light it is not growing through much
resistance anymore but the first part of its journey it is pushing its
way, it is growing, through resistance. It has soil all around it, and
the way that it grows is through pushing its way through the resistance.
Again this is a part of experience that human beings judge and try to
avoid, or at the very least try to get over with very quickly. But the
first part of your growth occurs, and can only occur, through engaging
with what you resist.
The seed gives you the clues to what is the journey of all life on this
planet. But human beings have held themselves apart from all life for a
long time. Yet nature holds so many clues for you. And one of them is
that with a seed, the first part of its journey, necessarily, is through
encountering resistance. In other words, the way to grow is to look at
what you resist as the first part of the journey. It’s not the only
part, the seed pushes through the resistance at some point, and then it
grows through light, but it cannot grow through the light, until it has
grown first through the resistance of the soil. We have positioned it
today in terms of a seed, and of the miraculous journey of a seed. You
can just as well think about it in terms of a baby, who also grows in
the dark for the first bit of the journey.
We are only talking here about conditions for flourishing, not
conditions for living. You can live without encountering some of these
growth points, if you don’t want to encounter them you can stop your
growth at any point. But we know very clearly your desire for
flourishing, and we are giving the cycles for that journey. It is not
the whole journey that you will be working through resistance, no. It is
only a certain part of it. Why? Because in order for your flourishing to
occur, for you to begin to grow in the light, rather than through your
own darkness, you first require yourself to look and encounter all the
things that you are carrying as resistances.
Your body helps you to identify your resistances. And you also run into
your resistances through pain. Physical pain, emotional pain and so on.
Pain and resistance are very closely related, and it is well know that
where there is no more resistance left, there is also no more pain. That
would be the point of breaking, blossoming, emerging, out of the soil,
and carrying on the journey in the light. There is no way to rush this
process, and there is no way to avoid it either. The seed will not grow
if it is not planted at its proper depth.
You may also have put two and two together already and realised that the
potential for depth of the seed, the deeper it is planted in other
words, the more resistance it has had to work through before its
blossoming. There are some human beings who choose very deliberately not
to work through all that much of their resistance in one life. Those
ones are planted at a relatively shallow level, and that is their
choice, and you cannot change that as we have already said [above] just
by wishing that they were deeper and by attempting to get them there.
But there are those who are prepared to work with all their resistance –
all - and it is possible. If it were not possible, and if it were not
possible for you, we would not be bringing this. It is possible for you
to have released all that which you resist. Again, if you want to know
where you are still resisting have a look at where you still feel pain,
physically and emotionally. Your pain is a little tick at an area at
which you still carry resistance. When you have softened your way, given
in, surrendered to all your resistances, then as the seed you emerge.
You have grown through the darkness, through the soil. You have grown in
the first part of your journey, you have grown via your resistance. It
is the only way that your growth can start.
You begin your journey of awareness, and of consciousness, you begin it,
everyone, by engaging with your resistances. It’s because you have
problems, in other words, that you start your journey. It’s because you
have pain, or dissatisfaction that you begin your journey. If you did
not, then there would be no way to start. You have to begin by the root
of your resistance. What we are inviting you into is to go as
consciously and thoroughly as possible into the middle of your
resistance. The more you give in to this part of the journey, the easier
the soil will just part ways for you and you will emerge. You cannot
avoid encountering your resistances, you can try, but you will remain in
the soil for as long as it takes, until you have dropped, let go,
softened every resistance you have to what is inside you, to what you
see in other people, to what you find in the state of the moment. We
have never talked about this before. But it is a very deeply wise way in
which to approach your own journey, and also to support the journeys of
others. Go into that which you resist. Make it an awareness for you.
Move there deliberately. Because that is, like the journey of the seed,
that is the first part of your growth.
Emerging Into the Light
If you are wondering whether the feeling of popping out of the soil
into the light is ecstatic for a seed, it is. That is the point where
some teachers talk of enlightenment, in the journey of the seed, and the
journey of the human being. For some human beings, who have intended it,
there is a moment where you have dropped every resistance you have. And
without knowing when it is going to happen, you emerge. You get glimpses
of your emergence before it happens. The closer you are getting to the
light, the more the sunlight filters through that dark soil. You can
feel sometimes a ray of sun that has penetrated the soil as the seed,
and still you don’t know what you are, remember. The seed still cannot
see. You still don’t know what you are becoming, what your purpose is.
You don’t know. But, every now and again you catch a bit of light. And
it pulls you further along your journey through your resistances. That’s
the only way to get to the light, to go through that which you resist.
As you get closer and closer to the breaking-through point - and may we
remind you that the only reason that we bring this forward today is
because this is your journey - you begin to feel different, and so you
should because you are different. You are no longer a seed, you are
something else. The same genetic material is still a part of you, but
you are totally different from a seed. You look nothing the same. It is
just so with the human journey. You will be the same source or essence,
but you will be totally different. When you run into people that knew
you as a seed and that meet you some while later when you are in your
emergence phase, they will say that you are so different, and you are.
There is a tremendous feeling of liberation when you emerge. We don’t
want to describe it. Words will detract from that feeling. You get
already glimpses of it, but it is possible, within this life, to move
out of the resistance material, and to carry on your journey in the
light.
Another way of putting this is to say that if you have gone into your
pain so thoroughly, it is possible to emerge from that, and to forever
grow in light. That is a possibility. We can’t rush it, and there’s no
way of going around it, but it is a possibility to carry on your
flourishing in the light. And do you know one of the first experiences
of being in that light? You can see.
All the growing and the struggling and the encountering again, and
again, and again of resistance, when you are busy in that phase, you
can’t see. We don’t take that for granted you know. It is extraordinary
faith that lets the seed keep on growing, even though it does not know
what it is. You don’t get the comfort, just like a seed, you don’t get
the comfort of knowing in advance what is the outcome of this journey to
give you some encouragement along the way. You don’t get the sight until
you have been thoroughly through the resistance.
So one of the glorious experiences of emerging is you start to be able
to see. You start to be able to see who you are. Now you can look and
notice that you are a mealie! Before, you did not know, and that is the
design. To try to know what you are while you are in the dark is very
difficult, and a tremendous frustration, and an enormous use of energy.
There’s no need to worry about that, it will become apparent to you, and
you will laugh at how you did not know all this time that that is what
you are. You will laugh because there will be a time when it is not a
mystery when you look around and you realise that’s what I am, all this
time I’ve been growing into a mealie. But that knowledge is not given to
you in advance, because it would change the journey, and that is not
useful. So being able to see is one of the tremendous experiences of
emerging into the light, besides the fact that you don’t grow via
resistance anymore. You’re not growing through soil after a time, and so
your growth is simply through light - through joy is another way of
putting it. And one of the first things is that you can see who you are.
You will still develop - a mealie doesn’t look like a full grown mealie
when it just emerges from the soil, but at least it can see some of what
it is. And that knowledge emerges as the growth happens.
There is a lot more for us to say about how to grow in the light. Very
few have let themselves do so, and we are honoured to invite you today
into that group.
It is a very significant giving that we are doing today because the
awareness of this can truly enhance and speed up the journey. Knowing
now that you cannot be emerged or born into the light until you have
encountered all your resistances, gives you more permission to do so.
Make that a priority. We cannot think of what would be a bigger priority
than going fully into your own resistances, into your own pain, and
coming out the other side, because without that your emergence is not
possible.’
Thank you to the special person who co-created this reading and gave permission for it to be shared here.
This reading has been slightly edited by Angela to facilitate easy reading and understanding.
© Angela Deutschmann
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